I'm not a good blogger.

But I'll try to fix that at this moment.

So last night (and, erm, this morning) I wrote my final paper for the semester. Thank God I'm done with those. I've come to the conclusion that I could not be an English Literature major because if my entire degree focused on analyzing fictional texts, I would probably fall into a state of extreme sadness and/or  a premature midlife crisis. (A mid-midlife crisis?)

So now I just focus on studying for finals, I guess. But we all know I'll procrastinate.

So what's been on my mind lately?

Last night I had a conversation with a friend, and right now I have the strong urge to rant about it.

(I will keep this friend anonymous because I'm pretty sure what they shared was private, and I don't want to embarrass them or anything.)

So this friend - a very thin, healthy friend - told me that they feel they must start dieting and working out more. Normally, this makes sense. It's something I definitely need to start doing, for one.

However.

The reason this friend wants to start improving their appearance is to impress their significant other.

Again, reasonable.

BUT.

It doesn't seem to be a mutual effort; my friend just feels bad because their significant other does not seem to appreciate my friend's appearance as it is, so this friend feels insecure and like they have to change themselves just to focus their partner's (awkward word) attention back to them.

Personally, I just feel like it's wrong to want to change yourself because your boyfriend or girlfriend isn't appreciating you.

Yes, of course you'll always find other people attractive, and blah blah blah all of that.

But if you tell them, "HEY, Significant Other, the way you always talk about/look at pictures of/compare me to other attractive people makes me feel very insecure, and I want to know why I can't be enough for you," and they continue to emotionally abuse you, then that does not seem okay.

I realize I overanalyze and over-think these things, but when someone I care about feels unloved, it just makes me angry.

Sorry about the rant.

On another note, I just have to mention:

I got THE MOST AMAZING care package from my aunt/uncle (godparents.) Barb, you are the best. I mean look at this:

Though it is filled with delicious chocolatey goodness (lots of Ghiradelli) that will only make me obese, it completely made my month, basically.

I really have to get going on actual work though, so I feel like I have incentive/deserve to eat all of the chocolate I got.

Kind of a pointless post. But oh well :)

P.S. I'm really bad at sending "thank yous" to all who send me things in the mail: packages, cards, whatever. But I really appreciate it all. It is so nice to know I'm being thought of! <3